Friday, September 24, 2010

Down and Out at the Superstore

Yesterday morning I was late for my aerobics class.

I leapt out of bed, wolfed my flax and fibre, fed the patriarch and put the spy car into warp speed. At the gym, which is above the Superstore, I screeched to a stop, jumped out, thundered across the tarmac and entered the building at full throttle.

My mind registered that a young woman was ahead of me, gawking at the early Hallowe'en displays and blocking my way with her grocery cart.

Desperate to make up for lost time, I deked around her.

As I did so, I stepped off the entrance mat and onto the shiny, smooth floor.

Did I mention it was raining and my shoes were wet?

I went into a slow motion, mind boggling free fall, and ended up flat on my back.

A crowd gathered. A crowd of concerned citizens full of sympathy I didn't deserve.

And because I know you are wondering, let me assure you of one thing:

There is absolutely no dignified way for a rain soaked sixty year old lady in spandex shorts to crawl out from under a pile of Wonder Bread.


Time to slow down and smell the autumn flowers.

Wes Crow's Market, 381 Canboro Road, Ridgeville

And enjoy the gathering of the pumpkins.

Wes Crow's Market, 381 Canboro Road, Ridgeville

 And hide out from the 300 billion or so people who witnessed my total humiliation.

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